Lost

I'm lost,
But i LOVE you,
So i'm not lost at all,
I have found myself... I'm with you..
Always.

Written by W.J.W 2k

All We Want

Do i try hard enough ?
Do i deserve you ?
You don't deserve the pain,
But what can i do to ease it again.
I'm not good enough,
Your to good for me.
Not sure what to do,
Not sure what we want,
Look at us,
We just want to be happy.

Written by W.J.W 2k

Everclear

Listen carefully and you shall hear,
me calling everclear....
For help, for some small relief
to this pain I feel.

Like the thump of a bass kick
and the snap of a snare drum flick,
my mind thrums with conflict
and my heart cracks unable to hold
all the love, anger, compassion, and hate.

All these feelings consume me, its all too new
I'm not sure how to react
or what to say,
can i survive
or will I strive
to destroy my soul for evermore.

- Wayne

The Real Me

Who am i ?
I know what i want,
but i don't know.
I feel alright,
but i don't.
I'm happy but i'm not.
I'm well but i'm unwell.

My head is clear,
but its clouded.
I feel but i don't, I speak but i
don't,
I think but i don't know what.
Once we get away....
Will we get
away ?
I have lost the mind that once existed,
I have lost myself.
If
we escape together i shall find him again,
If we don't he shall be dead.

Until that time we shall survive and i shall try...
To be like him, the
one you loved....
The real me.

Written by W.J.W 2k

Robbed

Taken away from me....
No, ripped from me,
My innocence is gone,

I feel like life is nomore,

Not worth living, only filled with hate.

People picked on me,
They didn't like my clothes,
They hated the way i
looked,
They beat me, Tried to change me....
They could not.
I'm a person dammit,
fuck off, leave me alone,
What did i do to you ?

Then he came,

Made out it was ok,
Tried to hide the wrong,
Paid for silence.
Made to
shut up,
Fearful of what people would
Say, Think, do, if they knew.
A person is compassionate,
People are cruel,
Judgemental.....At least thats the theory.

I'VE BEEN ROBBED,
Of innocence,

Of life,
Of normality.
I'VE BEEN ROBBED!!!
Someone please bring it back,
Someone please help me.

Written by W.J.W

Deep

whats with this mood.
it drags me down.
no reason.
its there.

it goes deep.
i'm lost.
never to emerge.
its cold.
it consumes so quickly.

i swim in it,
i drown in it,
i'm dead in it.

Look

You...
always look so....
so fucking thoughtful...

You...
always fill me with envy..
fill me with admiration...
make me with want..
its lifes cruel taunt.

You...
always have..
that look...
always the same..

thats where i see you...
thats where i meet you...
thats the look...
the way i feel....
my look.

Mental Decay

I'm sad,
I'm confused,
i don’t know what i want .......
but i know what don’t i want.......
I idolise, i fantasise.....
Its all there in my minds eye....
My world......
My other existence I idolise,
i fantasise... but there i can make it....
there i can see you...
This world scares me to death...
it decays my soul....
it sucks away at me...
pulls me down to my knees...
It sucks away at me....
pulls me down to my knees...
It sucks away at me....
pulls me down to my knees...
I get pulled down to my knees....
Its mental decay....
My mental decay...
I am the decayed.

Song written by Wayne Woodgate ©2000

Inspiration:

A Man many miles away across the Atlantic in a room,
a man with real talent.
The melancholy, frustration and sadness
i feel knowing that realistically
i'll never work with this man,
i'll never be taught what i want to know,
i'll never be able to truly express myself through music.
Because i'm not good enough. Dream:
A remix by Trent Reznor, maybe meet him.
The aforementioned man.
And yes i know he's just a guy but what better teacher could you have for music ?

Room

there is a place i go,
its so empty and dark.
there is a place i go,
its so cold and dead.
there's the room,
there are no walls.
just that door,
that keyhole,
that concrete floor.
i look at me,
the chains,
they bind me,
the spears,
they stab me.
i look at me,
i look away.

{far from here}
{i'm all alone}
{far from here}
{devoid}
{no}
{i'm trapped}
{can't get free}
{so inviting}
{terrifying}
{i see pain}
{pull me down}
{enforce my fate}
{slowly tear}
{so slow}
{so much blood}

Lyrics:

as i traverse my dreams i see you there.
i don't approach i'm way too scared.
do you, see me, standing there?
these feelings i don't dare to share....
do you, see me, standing there?
do you, see me, standing there,
because i see you.
{fade out repeating last verse}
alternately just stop dead.
not too much harmony in this song,
its sad and quiet finishing on a synth. nferno --

Nana

My throat chokes, but i chase it away.
How could this happen
i was having such a fine day ?
I put it off i was too scared,
i should have seen you but i would not dare.
Now its too late, your gone and i'll miss you.
Take care of yourself where ever you are, maybe one day i'll see you again.
Beyond this wall of pain.

WJW 2001 for Nan where ever she may be.